Life is quite often challenging. In our moments of suffering, we just want to ease the pain, and we don’t want to do it alone. We go through life looking for a soulmate that will help us make sense of it all. But you don’t just find that around the corner…
Sometimes we spend years and years all alone or with people who leave us feeling empty. We hope for a true connection only to find something that keeps us going, but after a few disappointments…we don’t believe in it anymore. And then, all of a sudden, everything changes.
What does it feel like when you find your kindred spirit?
How do you know you’ve found it in the first place?
And what about the difference between soulmates and life partners? Is the love we feel for our platonic soulmates less important than what we feel for our significant others?
If you’re curious about these questions, read this and finally find the answers you seek.
Can Soulmates Be Platonic Friends?
I’m certain that upon reading the word ‘soulmate,’ you instantly thought of romance. While you are quite right, it isn’t necessarily true. A soulmate can actually also be your best friend.
There are friends of numerous kinds. We share something unique with each of them. But as much as every connection is quite equally valuable, and should be cherished, finding a true soulmate just feels different.
I’ve even seen cases where a less meaningful, so to say, friendship is marked by a greater connection than what you have with your very best friend.
So if you’re wondering if what you have is ”just friendship” or a life-changing connection, I am here to help you out.
What Are The Signs You’ve Met Your Platonic Soulmate?
Encountering a kindred spirit can feel so fulfilling that it makes us abandon the friendships that lack that energy. Because, truthfully, when you strenuously exert yourself to make something work, it leaves you exhausted.
So, how exactly are platonic soulmates distinguished from an ordinary friendship?
How do you know that what you have is special and not something that just makes you feel less alone?
Let’s provide you with some answers!
1. You just feel it.
Have you ever looked at someone and felt like you’re the most blessed human being for having them in your life?
Have you thought how each former friendship could never compare?
Did you start believing in the eternity of things?
Let’s be frank – our intuition is a gift. If you feel that a person is special, it’s because they are. When you do experience this, ensure that it’s ever-lasting. Because a friendship like this isn’t one you come across all that easily.
2. There is no pretense.
The sad truth is that we always try to adjust to our environment. Rarely do we reveal our true selves. This is precisely why social situations can be so exhausting.
However, when you find the right person, you can free each part of yourself you had been holding back. You don’t feel tired because you’re allowed to express your thoughts and feel your feelings.
Of course, it’s entirely possible to feel happiness even if parts of you stay hidden. It’s not all black and white. But still, when you’re out with a platonic soulmate, you somehow manage to stay enthusiastic for hours and days after you leave them.
If you’ve ever felt that way, it seems you’ve got yourself a kindred spirit.
3. You can be vulnerable.
If you and your friend tell each other the most intimate things, you might just be platonic soulmates.
When you find the right person, you share things you never thought you would. You talk about your past traumas, current existential crises, desires you normally couldn’t say out loud…
Maybe boundaries ought to exist with each person, but still, platonic soulmates rarely get tired of listening to each other. They are the first person you go to because they never let you battle your woes in solitude and vice versa.
Have you ever unburdened yourself by revealing your most horrifying thoughts?
Did it only strengthen the bond between you and your best friend?
Well then, that’s the type of soulmate that should be appreciated forever.
4. Your jokes never go unnoticed.
There’s nothing quite like making a joke, only for no one to laugh at it. This can be especially hard when you have a sense of humor not often encountered.
However, when you form the perfect platonic relationship, both of you spend the whole time laughing. It’s never dull. You never feel unseen. You are free to be whoever you are.
Sometimes you repeat the same joke a hundred times, and it’s still hilarious. Or sometimes you say it at the same time.
It doesn’t matter if it’s the most memorable or the most lame joke in history, your platonic soulmate will appreciate it all the same. Because you’re not really that different.
5. If it’s interesting to you, it is to them too.
We all like sharing interests with our friends. It’s natural because there’s nothing more enjoyable than when someone knows exactly what you’re talking about. But there is that type of soulmate that wants to listen simply because you care about it so much.
For instance, I’m quite a fangirl, and people tend to get easily tired of me talking about fiction. And that’s valid. But the fulfillment I find when I start the same topic with my platonic soulmate is unparalleled.
She asks me questions only to hear me talk about it. Because she knows how much it means to me. And I do the same when it comes to her obsessions. There’s never any sign of boredom simply because we appreciate every second of the time spent together.
Have you ever loved someone so much and yet trembled every time they made a sexist comment?
Have they been proud of succeeding by using unethical means while you despise it?
Whatever our ideals are, the truth is, it’s hard to find people who share them. That’s why it’s so freeing to have a soulmate relationship where you share the same values. Not only do we feel utterly understood, but they further inspire us to never forget our own promises.
With their help, we are forever reminded of the importance of our own growth.
7. They remember your triggers.
Perhaps there’s a scene from your past you never wish to recall or perhaps one that happened not so long ago, but it pains you to hear it.
Your platonic soulmate will think about your triggers without you ever having to mention them. They pay attention because they care about how something might affect you.
I remember once wanting to play a song in front of my friend. Then suddenly, it occurred to me that the same song was playing at a time when she was very happy. What she had then is lost now, and she needn’t be reminded of that.
Something even more simple than a song may be someone’s trigger. If you notice how little you are triggered in the presence of your friend, trust me, it rarely comes naturally. It’s rather a deliberate act of love.
Plato did say, “He whom loves touches not walks in darkness.”
8. They encourage you to make the right choices.
All of us get slightly angry when someone disagrees with us. In moments of desperation, we fail to see their reasoning. We fail to see they only wish us to choose what is best for our mental health. Or someone else’s, for that matter.
Has the same guy been the object of your affection for years? If your friend attempts to make you see that he will never reciprocate your feelings, they only wish you well.
Have you ever been the one to toy with someone’s emotions just for attention? A friend who advises you to consider other human beings only does it for the love they bear for you and humanity itself. Best hold on to them.
You won’t always like to hear what your platonic soulmates have to say, but someone who loves you will do whatever it takes for the sake of your well-being. See it for what it is.
9. You are one and the same person.
Do people ever comment how beautifully you and your friend complement each other? It’s as if you’ve merged. There’s an intense energy surrounding you that comforts anyone who bears witness to it.
You always agree with each other. Not because you think you should, but because your minds work in the same manner. You’ve found each other this way, and you’ve grown beside each other ever since.
You make the same jokes, perceive people in the same way, and always perfectly comprehend everything others would fail to grasp. You can also feel when the other person is thinking of you.
Some people find so much sameness dull, but to you, it is exhilarating. There’s a sense of peace in knowing and being known. There’s comfort in not concealing the worst part of yourself because it so perfectly matches theirs.
10. You’re overwhelmed with curiosity.
I don’t know about you, but I found that it’s easier for me to love someone than like them. But when both those feelings are intertwined, platonic love like no other finds its place in your world.
Whenever they talk, you feel absolute enthusiasm, even if it’s the most trivial topic in existence. You want to hear why it matters so much to them. You always want to thoroughly question the reason behind each of their actions.
Since you’re platonic soulmates, you naturally know a lot about them. But the curiosity you feel watching them emotionally and intellectually evolve never quite ceases. For some strange reason, you’ve never found anyone more fascinating.
11. You feel inspired.
Platonic soulmates aren’t just good friends. They accept each other, all the while adopting traits that fascinate them.
Did your platonic soulmate inspire you to read more books?
Did their tendency to talk a lot make you realize the importance of your own words?
Or perhaps their courage made you courageous as well?
Whatever the case is for you, if your best friend is crucial in your self-development, I’m happy to say that you’ve found the most extraordinary kind of platonic relationship.
12. You feel heard.
I’d always wondered why I see one of my best friends in a whole different light. And it suddenly occurred to me – she knows all my languages.
I’m certain that you, too, have a unique language with each person. Sometimes you refrain from making a joke because you know they won’t laugh. Or sometimes, you elaborate your feelings in ways that don’t feel natural to you.
This is precisely why I cherish my best friend so much. I don’t really need to write her long paragraphs for her to understand (although I do, because I’m just that type of person).
She can understand my meaning even when I lack words, even when I’m not looking at her. Because she KNOWS me. She knows all my languages.
How Do I Find A Platonic Soulmate?
Platonic soulmates really are a rare occurrence. But this is only because people tend to pretend due to the fear of not being liked. If you manage to conquer this fear or reveal yourself despite its existence, you’re on the right path.
So, go approach someone that caught your eye or text that person you follow on social media.
Remember that creating a meaningful soulmate relationship requires you only to be genuine.
To see if you can trust people, you first need to let them in. It’s inevitable. I do encourage you to take the risk because it might just change how you see the world altogether.
Perhaps not everyone will like you, but that’s not the goal anyway. You want a true connection, right? I find that to have something real, we need to be real ourselves.
Abandon falsities of every kind, and you may just find your platonic love. It always exists in places that wait ages for the raw honesty you sought to offer them.
Can You Have Multiple Soulmates?
You indeed can. I myself have a few platonic soulmates. It feels different with each of them. Some do lack certain traits we mentioned a while ago, and others possess each of them.
Still, what’s important is that feelings of comfort and truthfulness are ever-present. Isn’t that what we seek?
Never be deceived into thinking only one platonic soulmate exists for each of us. I thought that to myself, and yet this year, I met a very special person who made me see the truth. And the truth is:
The love you feel for one friend doesn’t lessen the significance of what you share with others. Platonic love, or any other kind of love, is NEVER limited to one human being. You may love them in different ways, but it’s love all the same.
Are Soulmates Meant To Be Together Forever?
In a way, yes.
Perhaps we sometimes go our separate ways. Or, perhaps we come across someone else we form a connection with. Nevertheless, the soulmate in question will never be forgotten. After all, you call them that for a reason, right?
They have impacted your life in ways you couldn’t imagine, and their energy will never cease following you wherever you end up going. Them exiting your life doesn’t mean they’ll stop being a part of you.
However, sometimes we get so lucky that we indeed stay together for life. Rarely is anyone so privileged, but if you happen to be that person, recognize the value of what was bestowed upon you.
Can Soulmates Be Toxic?
Well, no, but how we perceive them can be.
If you happen to be someone who refuses to seek a similar relationship again, you aren’t doing right by yourself.
There are other people to meet and other connections to form. You cannot impose boundaries on your own love.
Know that it IS possible to value what you had/have with your soulmate all the while allowing yourself to experience something new.
Can You Be In Love With Someone Platonically?
Not quite.
Platonic soulmates are strictly friends. There is nothing romantic going on between them whatsoever. It’s just genuine love and affection without any expectations that usually come with romantic relationships.
It is possible to love someone immensely, to the point where you would sacrifice anything for them. Great love isn’t necessarily romantic. Actually, the bond we create with our friends can sometimes be far more powerful.
If you feel you’re in love, though, you probably are. You may be in a platonic relationship but what you feel for them isn’t really platonic love. In their core, though, platonic soulmates and romantic ones don’t greatly differ.
What’s The Difference Between Romantic And Platonic Soulmates?
Most people see platonic love as something that involves romance. But the two terms are actually completely distinct.
The most simple explanation is this: Platonic love lacks romance, and romance doesn’t necessarily involve friendship. Despite these differences, the gist of both terms is the same – there’s a deep affection between two people.
Sometimes we find that affection in primary school, sometimes in high school, at other times when we get old, or we don’t find it at all. Either way, we all yearn to feel it, romantic affection even more so.
Why is that?
Well, society sort of puts the idea in our heads that a life without a twin flame just isn’t worth living. What they don’t tell us is this: You don’t really have to be in love with them.
How Do You Know If You’ve Found Your Romantic Soulmate?
It is quite rare today to find a true romantic soulmate you make a perfect match with. The reason is the same concerning platonic soulmates – our tendency not to be genuine. If you do choose to be yourself, you will unlock a whole new universe.
But even if we manage to do that, how do we know our significant other is also our romantic soulmate?
How do we differentiate between a great relationship and an extraordinary one?
If you aren’t quite certain whether you’ve found the one, here are six signs that might help you out:
1. You’re both truthful towards one another.
You don’t lie to make your relationship work. This is precisely why you share such a great connection. You see each other for what you are.
2. You’re curious about each other.
There isn’t a single moment of boredom. Whatever they are talking about, you listen with great attention. You never feel like they’re ‘too much’ or ‘not enough.’
3. Your conversations cause sexual arousal.
Talking to them is so interesting that it excites you even more than their physique. It doesn’t matter if it’s an intellectual debate or just simple teasing. You surrender yourself completely.
4. You feel no anxiety in their presence.
There is no nervousness like everyone said there would be because you accept and enjoy each other so much that you’re both utterly comfortable.
5. You look no further.
Every other person vanishes off the face of the earth because you only want to spend time with them. They become the ideal romantic partner to whom no one compares, but who you compare everyone to.
6. You are best friends who are sexually attracted to each other.
This is why you get on so well. What you’re experiencing may be true love, but it’s the friendship that keeps it alive. You know you’re in it for the long haul.
If you’ve experienced any of this with your lover, that might just be a sign that they’re your romantic soulmate as well.
In The End…
There are numerous signs that help us recognize platonic soulmates. But what essentially matters is that both parties are utterly free to release their inner selves. There is mutual appreciation and understanding.
A platonic soulmate is your best friend, not someone you’re romantically involved with. On the other hand, if what you feel is romance, your relationship can’t be categorized as platonic.
Most of the time, though, platonic love is more powerful simply because there are fewer expectations. With romance comes greater risk.
You either manage to make it long-lasting, or you end up going to your friend for comfort because the ending was inevitable.
But either way, it really doesn’t matter whether our romantic relationship is going well or not, we still can’t wait to share it with our platonic soulmates. Our bond with them can truly be far greater than romance.