You’ve found out that your man has been unfaithful to you, and just like that, you feel like your whole world has come crashing down. You feel torn between giving him a second chance and moving on…
You love him and want him to stay in your life, but, at the same time, you’re afraid that it’ll happen again and that you’ll have to go through another heartbreak.
The truth is many people cheat, and we all make mistakes in relationships. However, the important thing is whether they accept those mistakes and sincerely apologize for them or not.
11 Surefire Signs He Regrets Cheating On You
How do you know if he really regrets being unfaithful to you? If your man shows these honest signs he regrets cheating, then he deserves another chance. And if he doesn’t, then my relationship advice is to choose yourself and move forward with your life.
1. He’s already sent you a ton of apology messages
Has he already sent you a ton of apology text messages? If your phone doesn’t stop buzzing and his name keeps popping on the screen, it’s one of the most obvious signs he regrets cheating.
Your man is probably going crazy because he knows what he did, and he’s aware of the consequences it may have. You probably don’t want to talk to him, and sending those apology text messages is the only way he can express his remorse right now.
However, his texts and apologies shouldn’t be enough for you to forgive him. He needs to prove through his actions that he’s genuinely sorry and give both of you time to reconsider the future of your relationship.
2. His body language says it all
There is nothing you can’t learn from a man’s body language, trust me. It’s just the part of us that can’t be controlled. It simply isn’t under our influence.
So, when you confront a cheater about his infidelity and when he asks for your forgiveness, pay close attention to his behavior.
If he can’t look you in the eyes or maintain eye contact, it’s a good sign he regrets cheating on you. If he keeps his eyes down, that means he’s ashamed of himself because he knows you didn’t deserve that betrayal.
He’ll also feel nervous and have difficulty speaking. That’s only because he’s afraid you might break up with him. You’ll notice that his confidence is failing because of that fear of losing you.
3. He takes full responsibility for his actions
If your man starts gaslighting you when you confront him about his infidelity, it’s a clear sign that he’s just a narcissist who doesn’t feel regretful for what he has done to you.
On the other hand, if he truly wants to keep you in his life, if he genuinely regrets and feels bad for his actions, he won’t make vague statements but take full responsibility and offer you a sincere, heartfelt apology.
If he was bold enough to hurt you in this way, then he should be man enough to stand by his actions and admit it. Of course, this won’t ease your pain, but it’ll definitely help you in the process of rebuilding your relationship if you decide to give him another chance.
If he, at any moment, starts shifting the blame onto you, just turn your back on him immediately. Don’t let him destroy you completely.
Remember, no matter what you did or how your relationship was, you can never be the one to blame for his infidelity. It was his decision, his act, his mistake, and he’s the only one who needs to take the blame.
4. He doesn’t only ask for a second chance – he wants to deserve it too
He won’t only use words to apologize and ask for forgiveness because he’s well aware that words don’t mean much when it comes to your love life. He’ll try to prove his words through his actions, which is a good sign that he regrets cheating on you.
He’ll make an effort to save your relationship, but, most of all, he’ll focus on changing himself because he knows that’s the only way to fix and make your relationship work again.
Then, he’ll prove that he’s a changed man. A man who would do anything he could to delete his past actions, heal your broken heart, and keep you in his life.
5. He makes it clear that it was a mistake he never plans to repeat again
If your man really regrets cheating on you, he’ll do anything to prove that it was just a mistake. A mistake that will never happen again because he won’t risk losing you ever again.
He’ll be aware that his actions may make you break up with him, and if he does love you, that will terrify him to death.
Proving his love for you and rebuilding your relationship will become his top priorities. And who knows, maybe your relationship becomes even better after overcoming these hard times. Trust me, it wouldn’t be the first time that happened.
6. He’s ready to work hard on rebuilding trust between you
When something like this happens in a relationship, it either ruins trust between partners completely or raises many trust issues that may be fatal for the relationship.
If your man is aware of this (and he definitely should be), he’ll immediately start working on rebuilding that trust between you. He’ll let you ask him whatever you want to know about the affair, and his answers will be completely honest.
He’ll even give you full access to all of his social media apps and profiles. It’s just one of the ways he’ll want to show that he’s really trying to get your trust back.
He’ll make it clear that, from this point on, he’ll never hide anything from you again.
7. He gives you time to be alone with your thoughts
When your partner cheats on you, it can really leave some awful consequences on your mental health. It can deeply diminish your self-worth and result in losing your sense of self.
So, before you even start wondering whether you should forgive him or not, before you ask yourself the question, “How do I know he really regrets it and won’t do it again?” you should give yourself time to process your thoughts and emotions.
In other words, you should give yourself time to heal.
And if your man honestly wants to win you back, he’ll be patient and give you all the time you need. He’ll respect your wish for some alone time because he’s aware that you have too much on your plate right now.
However, he’ll also make it clear that he’ll be there, waiting for you whenever you decide it’s time to talk.
8. His regret is obvious even to your loved ones
His efforts to save your relationship won’t go unnoticed by your co-workers, close friends, and loved ones. Those close to you will also see his regret, and they’ll probably advise you to forgive him too.
Especially if you were in a long-term relationship and if this was the first time he did something like this to you.
Maybe they won’t even know what exactly happened between you two, but they’ll advise you not to lose everything you built for years over one stupid mistake.
I know that you care deeply about your loved ones’ opinions, as we all do. So, if your friends and family think you should forgive them and have good reasons to think that way, maybe you should really think about giving him that second chance.
9. It’s clear that he’ll do anything to save your relationship
He’s trying hard to deserve your forgiveness and save your relationship. His efforts are visible not only to you but also to your mutual friends and everyone else around you.
You can simply feel and see that he honestly regrets what he has done and that he wants to fix his mistakes.
He has also made it clear that he’ll respect you and your decision, but he emphasizes that he won’t stop fighting for you. And the fact is, if he didn’t truly love you, he wouldn’t be doing all that and trying to fix your relationship in the first place.
10. He removes his affair partner completely from his life
If your man has cut off all contact with the woman he cheated on you with, it’s a telltale sign he really regrets his actions. It shows that he chose you and that he considers his affair partner a mistake that has no place in his life.
It’ll also mean that he doesn’t care for her… that he doesn’t have any kind of romantic feelings towards that other woman.
He obviously wants you to move on from that situation as soon as possible and leave it all behind for good. She was, is, and always will be a mistake that he (hopefully) doesn’t plan to repeat ever again.
This is especially important if you’re in a long-distance relationship. If he doesn’t show you that he’s done with that other woman for good, you’ll always have that trace of doubt that he might still be involved with her.
11. He suggests couples therapy first
One of the huge steps in fixing your relationship and making things work between you again is seeking professional help. Couples therapy can help you with rebuilding trust and improving your communication.
And if your man suggests going to couples therapy first and even finds a good relationship expert who could help you fix your problems, it’s a huge sign that he really wants to save your relationship.
This isn’t only about overcoming this problem between you – it’s also about strengthening your bond and getting to know each other on a whole new level.
There will be a lot of overwhelming feelings from both sides, and you won’t be able to cope with it all alone.
An expert will help you accept, share, and understand all those emotions, which will be of huge importance when it comes to making your relationship work again.
How Long Does It Take For A Guy To Regret Cheating?
Unfortunately, I believe that no one can give you a direct answer to this question. The time needed for someone to realize what they have done and regret their actions depends on so many things.
On the other hand, some men cheat and don’t ever regret it. They may feel regret for being caught, but they don’t ever feel remorse for hurting their partner in that way.
If a man is still in love with his partner, he’ll regret cheating on her the moment he does it. Because of his love for her, her pain is his, and he knows exactly how deep this will hurt her.
Also, if he respects and cares for his girlfriend but doesn’t love her the way he did before, he may not regret cheating right away. However, he’ll regret it after a while because he’ll understand that he should have done things differently.
See also: 5 Signs He Will Cheat Again: Red Flags To Watch For
Do Cheaters Realize What They Lost?
Well, this is actually one of the main reasons why cheaters regret their infidelity. After some time, they become aware of everything they lost just to get a moment of physical pleasure.
Once they’re all alone with their thoughts and emotions, it hits them big time. They become aware of reality.
They become aware of everything they’ve done and the consequences those actions left behind.
And when they get hurt in one of their next relationships, it’ll become even more clear to them. That’s when they’ll finally understand they lost gold, a true diamond actually, while they were busy chasing silver.
How Does A Cheater Feel After Being Caught?
It depends on two things: the current situation in their relationship and their feelings. To explain, if their relationship was a wreck, then maybe they won’t regret their actions at all.
They probably planned to break up with their partner anyway, so this has only made things easier for them. In this case, they’ll feel relieved because they finally unloaded that baggage off their back. Their infidelity made the other side end their relationship for them.
On the flip side, if it was really a mistake, if they love their partner sincerely, they’ll feel bad, remorseful, and awful after being caught cheating.
They’ll be ashamed of themselves when with their significant other and won’t be able to look them in the eye. They’ll be aware of the fact that one mistake could cost them losing something that was really worthy. That’s something they’ll never be able to forgive themselves.
Do Cheaters Get Their Karma?
Let’s not fool ourselves… In the end, karma gets us all one way or the other. Cheaters can’t run away from it, no matter how hard they try. Remember, what goes around always comes around.
Maybe it won’t hit them right away, but karma will come knocking on their doors sooner or later. They’ll get hurt by another person, and their pain will be even worse than yours.
And trust me, I’m not saying this just to comfort you, but karma is a bitch. You can’t hurt someone on purpose and expect that it won’t come back to haunt you. It most definitely will, and it’ll cost you your sanity.
To Wrap It Up
You’re in a very difficult situation, and I completely understand everything you’re going through. Of course, you have every right to give your man a second chance, but ONLY IF he clearly shows these signs he regrets cheating.
On the other hand, if your man shows no honest signs of remorse and regret, then you should simply let him go.
In this case, my relationship advice is to forget about revenge, forget about getting even, just focus on yourself and leave everything else to karma.
Maybe life isn’t fair, but karma always is, trust me.
If you think there is something worth fighting and saving, then save it. I can’t guarantee that you’ll forget about his infidelity, but time will bring you peace and strength to cope with it more easily.