You must have gone through a rough breakup and now want to see your ex suffer as much as you did. I’m not saying this is a good way to behave, but I’m also not saying there isn’t the feeling of sweet victory in winning a breakup.
We’ve all been through it, a bad breakup that leaves us feeling broken, and an ex that seems unbothered. But then you see it, signs your ex is miserable without you, and they miss you.
In fact, there is no sweeter win than being over them, and only then do they realize what they’ve lost. That’s what I’m talking about!
28 Telltale Signs Your Ex Is Miserable Without You (And Wants You Back)
Here are some of the signs your ex is miserable without you, misses you, and wants you back:
1. Jumping into a rebound relationship
If your ex-partner jumped right into a new relationship after ending their story with you, you shouldn’t allow it to make you miserable. In fact, it’s probably them who are miserable.
2. Social media is full with their new partner
After jumping into their new relationship, your ex immediately wants you to know how good they are doing without you. Therefore, they constantly post selfies and love quotes with their new partner on social media.
They want you to know their love life is doing good, but below the surface, they just want to make you jealous and get you back.
Even if your ex didn’t jump right into a new relationship, they still post about their amazing life on social media. In fact, you’re the only person that knows they are just sitting on their couch all the time.
They might post about a new travel location, a weekend getaway, or a training plan. Regardless, everyone needs to know about it.
4. Posting sad quotes
Another desperate sign your ex is miserable is them posting sad quotes on their social media accounts. Of course, this is not exclusive to quotes. It can also be sad songs, messages, or pictures. In any case, they are miserable and want you back.
They might be posting success stories all over Facebook or saying how they are living their best life, but you know it’s all pretend. In other words, your ex is probably looking for a way to show you they are doing good without you after your serious relationship ended.
6. New behaviors
If your ex has new hobbies or pastimes, this is a good sign that they are over you.
On the other hand, if they start smoking, drinking, or doing drugs excessively, it is one of the biggest signs that they are absolutely miserable with their lives.
Of course, they want you back and want to numb themselves so they don’t know what they’ve lost.
Another negative thing your ex might be experiencing is depression. We all fall into a depressive state after a breakup, especially if we loved the person we were in a relationship with.
Of course, this is a passing state that doesn’t last that long for most of us. For some, on the other hand, depression might last. If this is the case with your ex, try to help them through professional care.
8. Acting out
If your ex keeps acting out, like getting into fights, causing a disturbance, stalking you, or any other kind of negative behavior, it is most probably because of the breakup.
In other words, they are most probably doing it to get your attention. If anything gets out of hand, don’t be afraid to contact the authorities.
9. Weight gain or loss
Humans care about how they look, and gaining or losing weight can be a big deal for most of us.
Therefore, stress and depression can all cause your ex to gain or lose weight. This is another sign your ex is becoming interested in you again or has never even stopped loving you.
10. Hermit behavior
Just like depression and acting out, being a hermit can be another type of behavior your ex exhibits if they miss you.
This means they shut themselves away from their friends and loved ones, staying home all the time and isolating themselves.
11. Drunk text messages
This is a sure sign that your ex is still under your spell. I mean, if you receive a drunk text, you are surely the winner of the breakup. But what is so special about drunk texts and calls?
Imagine you are at your lowest point, and the person you turn to is your ex. Now, if this isn’t a sign your ex is absolutely miserable without you, I don’t know what is.
12. Stuck in a loop
If your ex is living a miserable life and they have no goals, are addicted to something, and constantly dating other people, you might think they are stuck.
In fact, you are right. They are stuck on you. After the breakup, they just can’t seem to pull themselves together.
13. Not returning your stuff
Another annoying but funny coping mechanism for exes is not returning your stuff to you. They keep it inside their apartment but will not give it back.
I will explain their behavior. They are holding your stuff hostage until they are ready to negotiate a truce with you. This is another sign your ex is looking to get back together with you.
Your ex shows they are miserable without you by trash-talking and disrespecting you and your new relationship. This is one of the most obvious signs your ex is miserable.
They won’t just stop at spreading rumors to your mutual friends, but these rumours will do the rounds on social media as well. This can look like passive-aggressive quotes and songs posted to their social media accounts or rumors that you have some kind of made-up disorder.
15. Asking about you
You might have heard from a mutual friend that told their best friend that told your grandma that your ex is still asking around about you. This is a sign they are still into you and interested whether you’re in a relationship.
16. Honest about it
If your ex has put their cards on the table and is completely honest about how they feel, then you shouldn’t give it a second thought.
Imagine how hard it is to jump over your ego and tell someone how much you miss them or that you are miserable without them.
You should trust your ex and decide what you want to do now. Get back together, think about it, or are you absolutely over them?
17. Still single
I understand most of us need time to adjust to single life. If your ex is still single a year after your relationship ended, there is no other reason than still being in love with you. In fact, they regret blowing their chances with you and still can’t get over you.
18. No change in behavior
Let’s be honest. Every breakup makes you evolve. It doesn’t matter if it’s for better or for worse. You definitely change.
If your ex hasn’t changed in any way, and you still see the same old person you were once with, that means they are definitely not over you.
19. Running into you
The oldest trick in the book is when you “unintentionally” run into your ex while going somewhere they know you’ll be. Be it your favorite theater, the building they work in, or a mutual friend’s house party.
In any case, you can read this as a sign your ex wants your attention again, will proceed to try and seduce you, and might eventually ask you to get back together.
Being jealous of other people around you isn’t just one of the signs your ex is miserable without you. It’s also one of the signs your ex will eventually come back to you. Of course, if that is your wish as well.
When they meet you, your ex might pull you to one side and tell you how you shouldn’t be in someone’s company. They have no right to tell you this since you are no longer in a relationship.
21. They stalk you
This can mean that your ex stalks you on social media and likes all of your comments, posts, and pages you like. It gets really annoying because you feel watched all the time.
You should definitely get worried if this goes beyond the internet and they start stalking you in real life.
22. Asking you out all the time
Another annoying way your ex shows they are miserable without you is by contacting you all the time and letting you know they are thinking about you.
These can be text messages inviting you on a date or phone calls just to talk. In any case, if this stalking gets out of hand, don’t be afraid to tell someone you trust or get the authorities involved.
23. Their friends contact you
Their good friends or family members constantly contact you and ask you to check up on them, but you don’t get why. Now you get it.
They must be so desperate that they constantly talk about you to them. Therefore, the friends contact you and beg you to get back together, all in their name.
24. No-contact rule gone south
We’ve all heard of the no-contact rule where you don’t contact your ex the 30 to 90 days after a breakup. You do this with the aim of either getting your ex back after this time or totally forgetting them.
25. Special treatment
Another thing your ex does in the pursuit of getting you back in their life is when they meet you, they give you special treatment.
Unlike before, when they didn’t treat you the way you deserved, your ex now gives you their undivided attention.
26. Reminiscing of the past
When running into your ex, all they want to talk about is the past and how good you had it back then. Oh no, this is surely one of the signs your ex is miserable but also extremely desperate to get you back.
27. Asking what you think
Once your ex contacts you, they constantly ask you what you’re thinking about, your thoughts on something, and what you believe they should do in a situation.
They act like you’re still in a relationship, which is totally different from the truth.
28. Still in contact with mutual friends and family
You might be broken up, but your ex still has the audacity to stay in touch with your family and best friend. What do they want to say with these actions?
They want it to seem like they are still in a relationship with you. How desperate can you get?
They Are Miserable, What Should I Do Now?
Don’t get me wrong – your ex wasn’t a bad guy or girl. They just broke up with you, and that left you feeling down. Now that you have the upper hand, it is much easier to control what happens next.
Therefore, if you’ve gone through this article and read through all the signs your ex is miserable, you must have found a few signs that absolutely describe your ex.
Oh no, you think to yourself, what should I do now? Should I take them back, brag to my best friend, or trash-talk them to mutual friends?
Luckily for you, I haven’t left you hanging and brought a list of the things you can do after you figure out your ex isn’t over you.
This way, they want to lure you back into their trap again. My thoughts are simple on this one: Run as fast as you can and never look back! In other words, do not get back with your ex at all costs.
Possibilities if your ex wants you back
Okay, now that we have that behind us, it is time to look at all the possibilities you have with your ex and think of a course of action.
Here are the things you can do after you’ve noticed some of the clear signs that your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend is miserable without you:
- Move on: If you ask me, the best option is to move on since there is always a reason you broke up in the first place. I wouldn’t consider these signs of your ex trying to get back together as anything other than a coping mechanism for losing you.
- Resolve your issues and see where it takes you: If you’re honestly worried about your ex, try to resolve your issues and work out why you broke up in the first place.
Address these problems, and see where that takes you. It can be finding a new relationship, splitting with your ex on good terms, or getting back together.
- Take your ex back: The simplest option is just to take your ex-partner back. This is a recommended step if you’re also still not over them. This way, you can look at your breakup as a mistake and proceed with a long-term relationship.
Choose one option, and proceed with your plan of action, and this way, you will have a clear conscience and be happy with how you handled the current situation.
How Do You Know Your Ex Isn’t Over You?
The easiest way to know if your ex isn’t over you is that they still want to engage with you even after you have broken up. This engagement can be talking, seeing each other, or anything else that can lead to getting emotionally involved again.
In fact, even acting like they don’t care, playing the jealousy game, or using the no-contact rule are all part of the signs your ex isn’t over you.
The main point is that they still care about you, and that is why they want to grab your attention by acting out, be it positively or negatively.
Here are some signs your ex is pretending to be over you:
- They keep contacting you (social media accounts, texting, or phone calls – I’d say they stalk you)
- Looking good and acting happy or angry towards you
- They keep showing up at places they know you’ll be
- Leaving their things with you
- They’re not dating anyone else but are still holding out for a chance with you
- Not giving your things back and still holding grudges
- They keep talking about the past and reminiscing about old memories with you
The signs your ex is miserable and the signs your ex isn’t over you are almost the same. In other words, if your ex isn’t over you, they will most probably be miserable because they missed their chance with you or because you are in a new relationship now.
Therefore, to find the definitive signs your ex isn’t over you, look through our list of the most obvious signs that your ex is miserable without you.
The signs your ex is miserable without you are not always obvious. It’s not like they will come out and tell you that they miss you. They might not even show it in their actions, but some subtle signs can give away the truth.
Once you notice them, make sure to make up your mind about a possible second chance. Remember, there is always a reason you broke up with your ex. You deserve a new life and not just another rebound relationship.
So, make up your mind and see if parting ways was a mistake and if you want your ex back or not. In the meantime, enjoy your win in the breakup and observe their misery a bit more before reaching out.