The worst thing a guy can do in a relationship is start acting distant without a proper reason. I know, it can really drive a woman crazy.
But, there is an even worse scenario… When he is distant but still texts every single day. You just can’t get to the bottom of his distant behavior while, at the same time, you don’t know how to respond to his text messages and how to behave in general.
I bet you’re waiting for him to text back right now. Well, while you’re waiting, here is an interesting reading that will definitely help you figure out a way to deal with your man’s distant behavior. Or, at least, it’ll make the waiting feel shorter, LOL.
13 Possible Reasons Why He Is Distant But Still Texts You
Let’s start by explaining some possible reasons why he is distant but still texts you very often. Be aware, though, that these reasons aren’t there to justify what he’s doing but to simply help you understand his behavior and true intentions.
1. Low self-esteem
Men with insecurities and mental health issues are prone to hot and cold behavior. From time to time, they just distance themselves for no apparent reason except for the need for personal space.
Because of your man’s low self-esteem, he may start doubting your feelings. Or, he may start thinking that you’re too good for him and that he doesn’t deserve you, which is definitely one of the reasons he’s become distant.
2. Personal issues
Has he ever mentioned any problems at work? Maybe he got in a fight with one of his co-workers? Maybe he has problems at home, with his loved ones?
If he has already told you that, then things are pretty clear. Your man isn’t distant because of you, he’s distant because of those personal issues, and unfortunately, he can’t stop them from affecting your relationship.
3. New job stress is affecting your relationship
If he has a new job, then I think his behavior could be justified. It can be really stressful to adapt to a new job and blend with your new co-workers.
If that’s the case with your man, you should show him you understand and give him some space. It shouldn’t be a huge threat to your relationship, just give him some time to solve those work-related things, and everything between you will be alright again.
4. He’s afraid of a face-to-face encounter
If you’ve met online and have been texting for some time, maybe he knows that it’s time for you to meet in person, and that terrifies him.
He probably likes you already and doesn’t want to screw everything up on the first date. However, if he truly likes you, he’ll have to overcome his fear, make the first move and invite you out.
5. Your first date didn’t go as he planned
Did you meet on a dating app like Tinder or Match.com and text for some time? Was everything fine, but you arranged the first date, and after it, everything changed, and he suddenly started behaving distant?
Well, there is only one logical explanation for that: he isn’t pleased with how your first date went. Maybe you were a super fun and interesting texter but didn’t give him that impression when he met you in person.
Or perhaps, he’s afraid that he didn’t fulfill your expectations. He thinks that everything was amazing when you were just texting and that he failed to keep up that feeling when you met him in real life.
6. He’s seeing another girl
I know it hurts to hear this, but it can definitely be one of the reasons. And unfortunately, it’s one of the most common reasons he is distant but still texts you often.
Last month, my friend was in the same situation. Once she confronted her man, he told her that he was confused and didn’t know which one to choose.
Of course, she immediately dumped his lame ass, and you should do the same IF you find out he’s seeing someone else.
7. He’s trying to put you in the friend zone
Trust me, it wouldn’t be the first time a man tries to do this. He isn’t interested in dating you, but he really likes you and thinks you could be good friends. That’s why he is distant but still texts you every day.
He probably won’t send you flirty texts or romantic good night messages, but he’ll reach out often just to check in with you.
He thinks that by being honest, he might hurt your feelings; that’s why he chooses to friend zone you like this and make it ‘easier’ for the both of you.
8. He’s testing you
If you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, he’s probably thinking about making your relationship more serious. However, some men like to test their better halves before deciding to take that step.
That’s why you shouldn’t confront him or get angry at him initially. Have patience and show understanding, and let him open up to you when he feels ready to.
9. He’s spending time with his loved ones
Maybe he had a family crisis, and now, he’s only focused on spending time with his loved ones.
And if he admits that he’s having family issues in your text conversation, then you need to show understanding. Let him know you’re there for him and that it’s okay for him to take some time out to solve his issues.
10. He’s afraid of commitment
If you were talking about a committed relationship and taking your relationship to the next level, maybe he just got scared. He probably cares for you deeply but still isn’t ready to commit. He doesn’t want to give you false hope and then, at the last minute, give up and leave you.
If this is the case, you shouldn’t feel bad because of it. He wants you to go easy, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want you in his future.
11. He’s thinking of you, but he’s still angry because of something you did wrong
Did you get in a fight over something before he started acting distant? If you did, there is your answer to why he is distant but still texts you very often.
He’s still angry at you because of your disagreement, but he misses you and can’t go against his feelings. He needs to check in with you because no matter how angry he is, he’ll always care for you.
12. If you were in an LDR, maybe he just got tired
Long-distance relationships can sometimes become too much for a partner, and maybe that’s exactly what is happening with your man.
If you can’t get it out of him, his close friends probably already know the truth, so you should try ask them. If they start acting nervous and try to change the subject of the convo, it’s a good sign they’re hiding something. That is, they’re trying to cover for their friend.
If that is indeed the reason for his distant behavior, you should be the one to leave. If an obstacle like distance could come between you and separate you, everything else will too.
13. He wants to break up with you
If you were in a long-term relationship, maybe he got bored, and his feelings towards you have just disappeared. However, because of the time you spent together, he doesn’t know how to admit it to you.
The thing is, he’s thinking about a breakup, but he doesn’t want to hurt your feelings. Unfortunately, he isn’t aware that the more he prolongs it, the more it’ll hurt you in the end.
How Do You Respond When A Guy Is Distant But Still Texts You?
I also wanted to equip you with the best tips to help you deal with your distant man who keeps texting you. So please go ahead, help yourself! ?
• Give it a couple of days
You should try to go no contact with him for a couple of days. Just ignore his texts and don’t text back no matter what he texts you.
Play video games, hang out with your best friends…just do something that will keep your thoughts occupied. Also, post some pics on social media just to make it clear that you’re ignoring him.
My advice is to go with the 3-day rule. That is probably the best way to find out whether he really has romantic feelings for you or if he’s only playing you.
• Then, invite him to talk face to face
The third day will probably be the most difficult for you. However, the next day, you should send him a text message. And I don’t mean you should send him a sweet good morning text, but instead cut to the chase and invite him out to talk.
If he doesn’t text back, then you’ll know that he didn’t want to be with you in the first place. He was only playing with you and maybe wanted to use you to satisfy some of his needs.
• Or, at least, give him a phone call
If you’re, for some reason, afraid to meet face to face, you can simply call him. Confront him through a phone call and let him know his behavior is really bothering you.
• Don’t let him manipulate you through mixed messages
Just don’t try to work things out through texting. He’ll probably offer some lame excuses or try to make you think that nothing is wrong and that you’re imagining it all.
And, the worst thing is when he is distant but says nothing is wrong. It’s like he’s trying to make you look crazy. And he actually is because it’s his form of manipulation to shift the blame onto you.
• If none of it works out, ghost him
If he still keeps denying that something is off, you should ghost him. But this time, for real. I’m not saying you should go no contact for a couple of days again; I really mean that you should ignore him like he doesn’t even exist.
I know it’ll be hard for you, but it’s really the only way to make him understand that his behavior is hurting you.
• If he still doesn’t make up his mind, wish him good luck
If he comes back, you’ll know that he cares for you. And if he doesn’t, well, then you’ll know that it’s time to move on.
You can’t wait for him to make up his mind forever. If he isn’t sure about his feelings, then he doesn’t deserve you. You just need to accept that he isn’t the right guy for you, wish him good luck, and turn your back on him forever.
Would A Guy Text You If He Wasn’t Interested Every Day?
Oh, he would, trust me. Maybe he isn’t interested in dating you, but he definitely has other intentions.
He will text you every day only because he wants to keep you around. He’s probably seeing other women, too, but wants to keep you on the back burner just in case some of those adventures come to an end.
He will send you mixed signals because he wants to confuse you and manipulate you into thinking he really likes you. However, you need to ask yourself if you really DESERVE that kind of guy by your side?
Why Does He Keep Contacting Me If He Doesn’t Want A Relationship?
To be honest, there are a few possible reasons. He may be insecure about his feelings towards you, or on the contrary, he might be doubting your feelings.
On the other hand, he might be keeping you on the back burner. Maybe he’s already in a relationship or is currently seeing someone else and isn’t sure what to do or who to choose.
Or, there is another option as well; maybe he doesn’t want a relationship because he wants to keep enjoying the single life but wants something else from you. In other words, maybe he’s only texting you because he wants to sleep with you.
In the end, whatever his reasons are, you shouldn’t allow him to keep using you. If he doesn’t know what he wants, you should.
You don’t deserve to be someone’s second choice when there are so many men who would kill to make you their one and only!
To Wrap It Up
I hope this helped you get into your man’s mind and figure out why he is distant but still texts you almost every day.
To comfort you, it may just be a phase, and you may overcome it as if nothing has happened. But unfortunately, it may also be a huge red flag that he’s about to break up with you for good.
Whatever his reason is, and no matter what happens, you just need to remember that it’s not your fault. Even if he leaves you, keep in mind that it’s his loss, not yours.