You’re into someone you don’t see as often as you’d like. Or are you too nervous to tell them how you feel in person?
Well, what are social media and texting for? You see, there is always a solution to your problems.
I know what you must be wondering now. You’re figuring out how to tell your crush you like them over text with minimal risk of being rejected.
Worry not because I’ve got you covered. Read on and follow my advice to achieve success!
How To Tell Your Crush You Like Them Over Text In 19 Ways
Here are the most efficient ways to tell your crush you like them over text:
1. Don’t do it out of the blue
When you’re wondering how to tell your crush you like them over text, the important thing is not to do it out of the blue.
This is real life, not a romantic movie, and trust me when I tell you that sending someone you barely know (or who doesn’t have any romantic interest in you) a declaration of love via text message out of the blue won’t work.
Actually, it will probably just scare them away. They won’t take you seriously, and you’ll blow the whole thing up before it even starts.
Of course, it wouldn’t be so awkward if you’re already flirting with this person face to face. Maybe they’ve been sending you body language signals that they’re into you as well.
However, even in that case, it’s better to have some kind of introduction to what’s about to happen.
2. Engage in conversation
So, how do you tell your crush you like them over text if you can’t just type I love you and hit send? Well, before anything else, you have to start some kind of conversation with them.
It would be best if you had an excuse to start texting them. Maybe they’re in your friend group, they’re your coworker, or you two have something in common.
That way, you’ll have a reason to initiate a conversation. The trick is to get them talking and for them to show you that they’re willing to start a convo.
3. Be careful about your conversation starters
Remember that you’re texting this person for the first time ever. Naturally, you need a way to start the convo right.
For that to happen, you need an awesome ice breaker.
If your crush is someone you already know, this won’t be so hard. For example, if they’re a coworker, start by asking them something work-related.
On the other hand, if we’re talking about a close friend, I’m sure you’ve already texted them before, so you’ll have less trouble breaking the ice.
But what if your crush is someone you don’t know so well? Well, in that case, a simple
Hi. What’s up?
Would be enough.
You should definitely use social media as your ally in these situations. If you follow them on Instagram or Snapchat, just respond to their story.
If you can’t think of a clever response, just send them an emoji reaction to a selfie they posted. A lot of people use this as an ice breaker because it works.
4. Improve your texting game
What do you do when they actually respond? Well, this is the point where you’ll have to improve your texting game.
Here’s a pro tip: if you are too nervous to text them, ask your best friend for some advice. They’ll give you a pep talk to improve your self-esteem.
When you talk to your crush, make sure you ask them open-ended questions. Make sure you tell them something about yourself but don’t forget that you’re here to get to know them too.
Don’t be afraid to engage in deep conversations – this is the best way to build an emotional connection with them.
It would be great if you had some basic info about this person before texting them. That way, you can show them that you have the same interests (even if you don’t, LOL).
For example, if you know what their favorite band is, send them a new song by them and ask them if they like it. Of course, you’ll pretend that you love listening to them as well. Don’t worry, these are just little white lies that won’t harm anyone.
5. Turn your conversations into a regular thing
Besides figuring out how to tell your crush you like them over text, your final goal is to turn your texting into a regular thing. Send them good night and good morning text messages, and always keep the conversation going.
Here’s another pro tip: never end the conversation. Never text them:
Goodbye, I got to go.
Instead, just disappear. Then, after a while, text them back, saying:
Hey, sorry, I had to leave. Where were we?
or something like that.
This way, the conversation never stops. And yes, this applies to good night messages as well – if you’re anxious about initiating the conversation all over again the next day.
6. Don’t forget to compliment them
Now that you’re both comfortable enough around each other, it’s time to start actually hitting on them. The best way to do this is by complimenting them.
Of course, your entire conversation won’t be all about praising and complimenting them. But paying them an occasional compliment every now and then will do the trick.
Don’t be too poetic when doing this. Once again, this is real life, not a romcom.
8. Be flirty
The last thing you want is to end up trapped in the friend zone. That is exactly why you’ll have to start exchanging flirty texts with them as soon as possible.
You can start by asking some playful questions. It’s okay to use innuendos, but please, make sure you don’t cross the line.
Tease them but never be vulgar. This is not the time for dirty text messages – you’re just getting to know each other.
9. Investigate how your crush feels
Before figuring out how to tell your crush you like them over text, it would be great if you could know more about their feelings.
First of all, find out more about their love life.
Are they already in a relationship? If they aren’t single, there is not much point in declaring your love for them, but you can do it anyways – without any expectations.
What is their type of man or woman? Are they emotionally available?
I’m sure you have some good friends who can help you find out all of this information.
But there is something more worthy of investigation: how do they feel about you? Sadly, there is probably no one who can give you this information – you have to figure it out by yourself.
Please, read between the lines and be honest with yourself. How do they respond to your texts? Do they flirt back? Did they open up to you?
The same goes for face-to-face encounters that happen in the meantime.
What is their body language telling you? Is there any eye contact? Do they smile when they see you?
10. Keep things light
Every dating coach will tell you the same thing: don’t put any pressure on your crush.
Tackling some deep topics is one thing (if you feel that they’re comfortable with it), but rushing things and taking your entire texting conversation too seriously is something else.
Instead, it’s better to keep things light. Pretend like texting them is not such a big deal and never show them that it’s the center of your day!
11. Use of emojis and memes
Should you use emojis when texting your crush or not? Well, it’s all about balance.
You should definitely use them to keep things light, especially when you’re joking or when you two are flirting. However, please, don’t allow for your entire conversation to be emojis only.
What about memes? Well, there is nothing wrong with sending your crush a funny meme that reminds you of them. Once again, this shouldn’t be the basis of your entire conversation.
12. But avoid abbreviations
On the other hand, every dating coach will tell you to avoid abbreviations. I mean, what’s the point? What will you do with all of that spare time you saved because you didn’t write the entire word?
Abbreviations make you look immature. It looks like you’re not interested enough to put effort into forming a decent sentence.
13. Double check your text with a best friend
Before sending THE text message, please double-check everything with a close friend. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not saying that you’re incapable of doing it by yourself, but a second opinion can’t hurt.
Ask your friend to be honest, even if it means telling you the harsh truth.
Are you being too pathetic? Is the text too cheesy? Is it even time to send a risky text like that? Should you be more direct? Or maybe you’re being overly direct?
You’re blinded by infatuation, and there is no way you can find the answers to all of these questions by yourself.
14. Timing is everything
By now, you’ve learned a thing or two about your crush’s routine. That’s why it’ll be easier for you to pick the perfect timing to send this text.
Don’t do it while they’re at work or in lectures. Don’t send it if you know they’re out with friends either.
You want to pick a time when you know they’re alone and preferably not busy. Also, make sure it’s not too late when you send them the text.
What if they’re already asleep, and you stay awake all night, waiting for their response? Of course, everyone’s schedule is different, so I can’t give you the precise time to send the text – you have to pick it yourself.
15. Don’t expect too much
I don’t mean to kill your mood, but I have to warn you not to expect too much. First of all, people can smell desperation.
Trust me, you might not feel it, but your crush will. And it will be a major turn-off for them.
When you send your text, the only thing you should feel is relief. You’ve done the “dirty work,” you’ve gotten everything off your chest, and things are now out of your control.
As scary as this might sound, at the same time, it’s also liberating.
After all, what’s the worst thing that can happen? They tell you that they don’t feel the same way?
Worry not because you’ll have a backup plan for that scenario as well.
16. But don’t let your insecurities get to you
However, there is a difference between being ready to handle failure and seeing it as the only possible option. When you’re wondering how to tell your crush you like them over text, make sure not to let your insecurities take over.
Having low self-esteem is a major turn-off, the same way desperation is. You’re worthy of this person’s feelings.
Just because you’re into them doesn’t mean they’re better than you in any way. Instead of acting nervous and insecure, show them that you see your worth, even if they don’t.
17. Be clear about your intentions
I can’t stress this enough: don’t get trapped in the friendzone! That’s why you simply must be clear about your intentions.
No, you won’t tell them I love you. You won’t write them a love poem or anything like that.
However, you have to make it clear that you want something more than friendship.
If necessary, be straightforward and to the point by texting them something like this:
I like you, do you feel the same way about me?
or
I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately. Do you want to go out on a date?
18. No essay-long texts
When I told you not to write them a love poem, I also meant not to send them essay-long paragraphs in which you declare your eternal love for them. A text like this will be awkward and just chase your crush away.
There is no need to go into detail about your feelings. Don’t act like a tragic hero from a romantic novel, and keep things as short and concise as possible.
19. No double or triple texting them
But what if they don’t respond after a certain time? Well, nothing! It’s not like you have much choice left.
No, you won’t double or triple text them.
You won’t ask them if they’ve received your initial text – I’m sure they have; after all, it’s delivered or even read.
You won’t ask them if they are ready to give you an answer – they’re not; if they were, you would have gotten one.
Give them time to process things and make up their mind. They’ll text you back sooner or later.
And if they don’t? Well, no response is a response as well.
If They Respond Positively
So, the best thing ever happened. They said they liked you back. What should you do? How should you act?
1. Ask them out on a first date
First and foremost, you’re going to ask them on a date. You won’t keep on exchanging texts forever, will you?
It’s time to see each other face to face and talk about your potential romantic relationship. After all, this was what you wanted all along.
But don’t send them a text:
Hey, would you like to go on a date with me?
Instead, suggest a specific date idea.
This doesn’t have to be anything fancy – meeting at a local coffee shop will do the trick. However, you should be the one to set the time and date.
If they can’t make it at that specific time, suggest a rain check. Don’t worry, I’m sure they want to go out with you.
Whatever you do, don’t suggest Netflix and chill or something like that. If you do, they’ll assume you have just one thing in mind, and they won’t take you seriously.
2. Tell them that you’re happy
There is nothing wrong with telling them that you’re happy with their response. After all, you’ve been wondering how to tell your crush you like them over text for a while now.
3. But don’t make a big deal out of it
However, try not to make a big deal out of it. Remember – you told them you’re into them, not that they’re the love of your life and that you can’t live without them!
I know that your crush’s simple yes is a huge confidence boost, but please don’t let them see how much it means to you because an overly thrilled reply might make you appear desperate, and you don’t want that.
If They Don’t Feel The Same Way
The worst-case scenario has come true. They don’t like you back, and they only see you as a good friend.
Tough luck, but that’s part of life. And this is exactly how you should take it.
1. Don’t be too pushy
First of all, be aware that it’s their right not to like you. It’s probably nothing personal – maybe they’re in love with someone else, or you’re just not their type.
After all, I bet you like them for no particular reason. Well, it’s possible that they don’t have a specific reason for not being into you – they just aren’t.
The bottom line is that you shouldn’t ask for an additional explanation. Don’t send texts like:
Why don’t you like me?
Could you like me in the future?
Is there anything I could do to make you like me?
Don’t lose your dignity, no matter what!
2. End the conversation politely
No, you won’t tell them that you’ve sent the text to the wrong person just to make things less awkward. Trust me, something like this will actually make things even more awkward!
But you know what would be even worse? Insulting your crush or trying to put them down just because they don’t like you back.
Instead, end the conversation as politely as possible. Send them a text like this:
I’m sorry that you feel that way but thank you for your honesty. No hard feelings!
or
I can’t say I’m not disappointed, but hey, life goes on. It would be easier for me if we didn’t stay in touch – I hope you understand.
3. It’s not the end of the world
Finally, please, don’t see it as the end of the world. I know it feels like that now, but trust me, it really isn’t.
Instead of seeing this as a huge defeat, take it as a lesson. Be proud of yourself for being brave enough to step out of your comfort zone and take this risk.
Don’t repress your emotions – it’s perfectly okay to be disappointed. However, don’t let this one negative experience prevent you from trying something similar in the future.
Should You Tell Your Crush You Like Them Over Text?
I’ll be honest with you – it’s always better to have this conversation in person. Nevertheless, if you’re too nervous to tell them how you feel face to face, there is nothing wrong with doing it via text.
What Should I Say To My Crush Over Text?
If you want to impress your crush with your texting skills, compliment them, and don’t forget to ask them open-ended questions so you can keep the conversation going. Here are some examples:
You looked so cute today.
I dreamed about you last night.
I have a confession to make: I can’t stop thinking about you.
How was your day?
What do you think about [insert the name of a movie or mention a current event]?
To Wrap Up:
There is no right answer to the question of how to tell your crush you like them over text without getting rejected. Actually, there a magical way to make them give you a positive response doesn’t exist.
However, the important thing is that you give it your best shot. Good luck!